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The second paragraph of the first chapter grabbed
my heart. "Maybe God didn't call me to the ministry. Maybe I should just quit. I
could never take my own life, but right now I'd rather be dead than dying this
slow death. I know Jesus wants me to pay the price, but this is too much for me
and my family to bear" (p. 13). I had to keep reading. This book had something
to say and I wanted to find out what counsel it offered. How great it was to
know that I was not struggling alone with difficulties, doubts and stress.
If you are a pastor, you need something in your
life beyond your family and church to help you face the pressures, stresses, and
difficulties of ministry. Before you piously say, "I have the Lord, my calling
and prayer - what else do I need?" let me appeal to you for honesty and
humility. How lonely are you? Are you part of the eighty percent of pastors who
are discouraged?
We pastors preach the importance of fellowship,
discipleship, friendship and accountability in the Body of Christ. In sermons
and in Bible study, we proclaim the "one anothers" - love one another, forgive
one another, pray for one another, accept one another, encourage one another.
Yet, we lack significant "anothers" in our lives to enable us to practice what
we preach. Who do you fellowship with closely? Who challenges you to be faithful
to the Word? Who are your close friends who can encourage you? Who holds you
accountable? These are good questions for Christian leaders to ask themselves.
The entire focus of Kinnaman and Ells' book is to
present the need for "covenant friendships" to Christian leaders. This is that
is taught in the "words of wisdom" in the Old Testament. Let me refresh your
memory:
- Proverbs 17:17 "A friend loves at all times,
and a brother is born for adversity."
- Proverbs 18:24 "A man of many companions may
come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother."
- Proverbs 27:6 "Wounds from a friend can be
trusted…"
- Proverbs 27:9 "…the pleasantness of one's
friend springs from his earnest counsel."
- Ecclesiastes 4:10 "If one falls down, his
friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him
up." [emphasis added]
Question: How many friends do you have that fit
the description of the friend taught in the verses above? Yes, you have your
seminary buddies and there are your co-laborers in the pastorate in presbytery.
How about a friend that "sticks closer than a brother?" This type of friendship
takes commitment. Don't be a part of the burnout, fall-out or dropout
statistics. Follow the wise, practical counsel of Scripture and listen to the
testimony of two Christian brothers who know the benefits of "covenant
friendships."
Read this book…you'll be glad you did.
Al Bennett, Former CEP trainer and pastor of
Millbrook PC in Alabama
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